Exclusive: Microsoft revealed to be creator of Snap Packaging for Ubuntu Linux

Date:
Sat, 16 Jul 2022 17:49:32 GMT

Description:
See? I told yall we love Linux, snickered the Microsoft CEO.

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In an exclusive to The Lunduke Journal, Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella disclosed that the original creator and developer of the Snap Packaging system for Ubuntu Linux was none other than Microsoft Corporation.

We at Microsoft are incredibly proud to reveal our creation of Snap packaging for Linux, stated Satya Nadella. It makes Firefox run like molasses I mean makes Firefox more secure. Plus it totally breaks printing on Linux I uhh I mean makes printers more secure or something? Printer security is important.
Yes, indeed. Snap packaging might be the most innovative way to *cough*
help Linux in over 20 years.

Until now the true author of Snappy had remained a mystery. With the only clue as to its origin being the following comments at the top of the Snap source code. // This code was totally not written in Redmond.
// And is definitely not copyright Microsoft Corporation.

Upon learning about Microsofts creation of Snap Packaging, every Technology Journalist along with the Linux Foundation simultaneously published the exact same statement, word for word: This is yet another example of
Microsofts support of Open Source. They are a good friend to Linux. That whole Embrace, Extend, Extinguish thing is just a myth. And were not just saying that because of the large amounts of money Satya gave us.

See? I told yall we love Linux, snickered the Microsoft CEO.

In related news

When asked about Microsofts recent hiring of the creator of Systemd, a Microsoft representative had the following to say: We definitely arent going to pay that guy to make all of those Linux systems slower and more bloated. *wink wink* roflcopter

This is satire. Please dont sue me.

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Link to news story: https://lunduke.substack.com/p/exclusive-microsoft-revealed-to-be


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